Maybe I Can Help

Anonymous asked: hey dude, so does your smoking affect your running? how many miles/how long do you run?

It does, but I try to keep it to 2-5 cigarettes a day. I haven’t been running regularly because it’s cold outside and though I do belong to a gym, it’s a prohibitive distance away in the winter. Given my history of pneumonia (had it a grand total of 3 times over the last 2 winters), I won’t chance running outside. I did some running back in PA last week, and my splits are worse than when I wasn’t smoking. About 7:15/mile now vs. 6:30/mile back in June. All things considered, 7:15 isn’t bad.

That said, Jordan and I have a workout we do 3 times a week. It is as follows:

• Take a deck of cards, leave the Jokers in.
• Shuffle.
• Take cards off the pile one at a time. We’ve designated the cards thusly: 

1. Clubs = abdominal crunches
2. Spades = lateral/front raises (shoulder)
3. Diamonds = push-ups
4. Hearts = Push-ups with leg extention (Essentially, you use only one leg - the other is extended behind you, working your lower back and ass.)

• Whatever number is on the card, do that number of reps for the designated exercise.
• Each Joker is one minute of abdominal exercises of your choosing. You are not allowed to pause at any point in this one minute.
• Keep rest periods as short as possible. You can also choose essentially any exercise you like, but be cautioned: this is a fairly advanced routine. Jordan and I both have years of experience with extreme exercise regimens.
• Wheeze, sweat, cry. 

What not to do

I thought I’d use my last 6 days as a shining example of how NOT to take care of yourself. I (along with my roommate) am prone to what some might call “excessive fun” on weekends, but this one was over the top.

When I weighed myself last Wednesday morning, I weighed in at 206 lbs. - a bit above my comfortable weight of 195, but an inevitable result of holiday food and lack of city walking (thanks to my present lack of constant employment). This morning I clocked in at 189 lbs. To save you the math, I unwittingly lost 17 lbs. in the last 6 days. That is dangerous. It also makes future weight gain this week inevitable. I’ll likely gain 4 or 5 lbs. by Thursday.

Lessons to be learned:

• Eat, especially breakfast. It’s said constantly, but it’s hard to overstress the importance of it.
• Drink water. Alcohol dehydrates.
• Avoid whiskey. This isn’t fitness advice as much as life advice.
• Don’t ingest substances you can’t readily identify. This is also life advice.

Anonymous asked: I want to lose the last 15lbs but i'm never sure if my diet or workout is really on board for that? What kind of workouts do you suggest and how much during the week? I'm a 21 year old female with most of the weight on my midsection.

15 minutes of cardio is enough to ramp up your metabolism for an hour or more. The best time to do it is morning, because it starts your body on the process of burning fat and allows it to continue doing it for a good part of your day. In addition, it decreases appetite, reducing the chance that you’ll get hungry and snack too much, which can be a source of hidden calories. Also remember that snacking on carbs alone causes a blood sugar spike. When your blood sugar inevitably drops, you’ll be hungry again, and possibly begin snacking again. Snacks like almonds and greek yogurt contain enough fat and protein to curb the cravings.

The biggest benefit is that exercise is a stress reducer, which will prevent your body from releasing cortisol, which is the most common culprit of midsection fat. Keep in mind that losing weight is a marathon, not a sprint, so small doses of regular exercise are much better than sporadic 2-hour torture sessions in the gym.

Anonymous asked: Yeah. More pictures of your arms.

Right.

In which I realize I’ll have to be slightly more creative to keep this blog even marginally interesting.

absurdlakefront asked: I have lost quite a bit of weight over the past year and half via dietary changes and swimming, but I need to step up my workouts. What do you suggest for someone generally unaccustomed to workouts other than swimming? I'm pretty good at burning fat it seems, but I could use some advice on how to build muscle so I can burn even more fat and fill in some muscle. I've always thought I was hopeless when it came to working out, but I think I just never sought the appropriate knowledge.

*Regrettably Required Legal Disclaimer: always consult a doctor before you do anything ever.*

Swimming is more than a little demanding, so circuit training would probably work well for you. Keep workouts fast-paced with short rest, and focus on a few areas. It depends on how often you want to work out, but I would split it into two workouts (upper and lower body) twice a week (but probably once a week for the first week or two to allow adequate rest), or three workouts (upper, lower, core) once (or twice, if you’re game) a week.

Keep early workouts near 30 minutes with no more than 30 seconds of rest between sets. You can use pretty much any equipment - cable systems, free weights, bands, etc. - with this, as long as it’s a weight you can work with. To start, aim for 8-10 reps on sets, then increase to 12-15 if you feel comfortable with it.

As for the exercises, try to stick with movements that work a lot of muscles. As luck would have it, these are often the most popular: bench press, shoulder press, bicep curl, deadlift, squat, so they’ll probably form the core of your workout. Add other, more specific exercises (lateral and front raises for shoulders; calf raises for, well, your calves) later. There are some decent sample ones online, but I like this one, though it doesn’t split the workout by body part. (It’s largely a matter of preference, but workouts split by body part tend to be more tiring.) The diagrams at the bottom are somewhat helpful, too.

Use weight you can easily control, keep good form, and if you’ve caught your breath, you’ve been sitting too long. Enjoy. :)

barefootpirate asked: For someone just starting to take working out and nutrition seriously, what would you recommend a weekly diet to consist of as well as some workouts one can do before they start out at a gym. Love the idea of your blog and am definitely considering starting one for my progress. Thanks!

First, thanks for the question.

Second, I am a certified trainer, but not a nutritionist. I can give some advice, but for serious nutrition counseling, I (legally) advise you to speak to a nutritionist.

My diet is fairly simple. I keep carbs low (around 50-60 grams a day, which works out to 200-240 calories from carbs), protein high (100+ grams per day, anywhere from 400 calories all the way up to, I don’t know, 1,500?), and I pay little attention to fat.

The theory goes like this: By restricting carbs, you force your body to burn fat as a fuel source. Your body can use protein for energy (by converting it to sugar), but likely won’t unless you eat a ton of it. Your body can also use dietary fat, but it prefers other sources first. For my size (6’4”, ~195 lbs.), 50 or 60 grams are sufficient. Eat more of your carbs early in the day, and choose slow-digesting (whole grains) over quick-digesting (white bread, white rice, sugar).

Pre-workout, you want some carbs and some protein. Eating too many carbs can make you sleepy (as can too much protein…), so keep it light. Feel free to sip a sports drink during the workout, especially if it’s vigorous or especially long.

Post-workout, you want protein. I drink whey powder mixed with cold coffee and 2% milk. It’s about 300 calories, 50 grams of protein, 20 grams of carbs, and 5 or so grams of fat. Consume within one hour of resistance workouts.

Remember: blood sugar spikes lead to carbs being stored as fat. To avoid a blood sugar spike, keep carb consumption below 20-25 grams at a sitting. Fiber does not count toward those grams of carbs, so subtract the grams of soluble fiber from the total grams of carbs to figure out the blood sugar (glycemic) impact of what you’re about to eat. If it’s less than 20-25, you’re golden.

As for the workout itself, I’ll post that a bit later. Hope this helps!

So, why?

Right. Why.

My reasons for drinking are straightforward - it’s fun.

My reasons for smoking, less so.

I still consider myself mostly a social smoker. Most of the best conversations I’ve had have begun not at the bar, but outside it. Smokers are an interesting cross-section. For instance, people with a history of emotional problems are more likely to smoke. This means depression, bipolar disorder, adjustment disorder, anxiety disorder. To surround yourself with these people is to hear stories. Funny, heartbreaking, confusing, disturbing - the entire spectrum. What interests me isn’t the stories themselves, it’s people. I love watching people while they talk. Keen observers can see shifts in their subjects. When talking about great triumphs, their chest puffs, they pull their shoulders back, they face their audience. When talking about moments of sadness and anxiety, they shift away from their audience, cross arms over chest, cross their legs, rotate, shift, twitch. Endless fascination.

This isn’t the only reason, of course. Nicotine makes a lovely counterweight to alcohol, and smoking gives me a reason to step out of a tense or uncomfortable situation.

Why do I work out?

Because I was a fat kid. When I was 14, I was 5’10”, 260 lbs. I was slow. I was unathletic. I got picked on. I hated it. Luckily, my little league baseball coach was a personal trainer. He took me under his wing and showed me how to train. I lifted weights every day, and for the first time, I learned about hard work.

Working out keeps me sane. No matter what happens in a day, week, or month, I have time set aside for myself where I disregard it all. Everything. I forget about every shitty thing that has happened, every rude comment, every rejection, every failure, every setback. For a few hours a day (or an hour a day… or a few hours every few days), I think of nothing but the task at hand. It becomes zen. Working out is my meditation - in truth, I’m too hyper to sit still and think of nothing, so I do it on the run.

I don’t work out to be huge, to get girls*, or to be able to defend myself in case The Iron Sheik tries to take my wallet at the pub. I do it because it’s the one constant I have. I work my ass off, I eat something, and I go on with my life. As with everything in life, you get out what you put in.